Canadian Counselling and Psychotherapy Association

Relationships are an art form created by two individuals who have a similar or complimentary sight, passion, and ambition. rarely has a relationship developed without its increase pains. similar to the development of the human body ; a relationship is affected by the nurturing it receives. If a relationship lacks in nutrition it will not have a healthy development. unhealthy relationships are most normally lacking in the most essential of component : healthy communication. What is communication ? It is the ability to convey or share emotions, feelings, sentiments, and desires. communication can be sent or received through verbal or gestural cues. Healthy communication is the ability to communicate without offering hateful or undesirable responses. While not all communication will be received with a welcoming spirit ; healthy communication acknowledges that we have a right to “ agree to disagree ”. LEARNING TO COMMUNICATE

communication is not only what we send, but how we receive information sent by others. In some cases, we seek to be offended, shamed or judged. In early cases, we seek to place judgment, blame or criticize the lives of others. Either manner, if we are seeking electronegativity, we will find it indeed. Learning to communicate is in part knowing why we communicate the messages we communicate. What to communicate when there is a message to be sent, and when to communicate such messages. For many, communication errors occur when the messages are either station or received at the incorrect time. Another form of communication error occurs when the messages are misinterpreted by the sender or the receiver. “ Of all the skills we develop… communicating is one that we ’ ve been practicing since birth. And yet it much gets in our direction, causes stress, and leaves us at a loss. We besides frequently miscommunicate, obfuscate the compass point, cause an unintended reaction, or avoid a messy discussion altogether. ” ( Hedges, 2011, Online ) Communication is an art shape that is crafted throughout our lives, if-and-only-if, we have been taught by person who has learned the art of communication. There is no clandestine to communication, but the truth is, we have all received wrong instructions on how to communicate. THE KEY INGREDIENTS TO HEALTHY COMMUNICATION The key to healthy communication is having a willingness to lay apart our defensive tendencies and take responsibility for our part of the relationship. Healthy communication entails exercising our active listen skills, reflective heed skills, and having personal insight. If we want to have a healthy relationship, we must establish and seek to maintain healthy communication. If we are angry, we need to recognize that it is our province to accept our stream state-of-mind. For no one can very cause us to be angry, agitated or enraged, preferably we choose a negative form of communication to express our emotional state. anger can be a reaction to negative or hostile communication, or it can be our own negative or hostile communication directed towards another. “ It ’ s important to remember that angry people are much people who can ’ deoxythymidine monophosphate commune effectively… unfortunately, an angry response to criticism is likely to trigger even more anger and criticism from the other person rather than problem-solving communication. ” ( Mckay, Fanning, & Paleg, 2000, p. 153-154 ) The key to healthy communication is learning to communicate without becoming angered, agitated, or enraged. ACTIVE listen frequently, active heed is a skill lost in our communication. “ People often fail to listen carefully ( actively Listen ). They may assume they know what the other person is saying or will say ( because they have heard it before, or they assume that one person is ‘ barely like ’ another person from the same group ). ” ( University of Colorado, 2013, Online ) Active listening takes intention, What does active Listening entail ? It entails dependable physical carriage, gestures, and purposeful eye reach. As an active hearer, you will align your body towards the intended recipient. You may lean towards the sender or receiver, maintain active eye contact, posture your soundbox in an afford mannequin, and be relaxed while nonverbally communicating. active Listening is besides being capable of reflecting any verbal or nonverbal communication that is communicated. What does active Listening imply ? “ By systematically listening to a speaker ( another person ), you are conveying the theme that : ‘ I ’ m interested in you as a person, and I think that what you feel is important. I respect your thoughts, and even if I don ’ t agree with them, I know that they are valid for you. I feel sure that you have a contribution to make. I ’ m not trying to change you or evaluate you. I just want to understand you. I think you ’ ra worth listening to, and I want you to know that I ’ m the kind of a person you can talk to. ’ ” ( Rogers & Farson, 1987, Online ) REFLECTIVE listen brooding listening reinforces that you have been actively listening. reflective heed is intended for mirror and clarifying communication that you have received. It is through brooding listen that the transmitter can feel heard, acknowledged and amply recognized for the value of the words they have offered. furthermore, it is through brooding heed that the sender can be reassured that what they have communicated has been clearly comprehended by the receiver. “ There are three basic levels of reflective heed that may deepen or increase the affair and thereby change the affectional tone of an interaction. In general, the depth should match the situation. Examples of the three levels include :

1. Repeating or Rephrasing – Listener repeats or substitutes synonyms or phrases; stays close to what the speaker has said
2. Paraphrasing – Listener makes a major restatement in which the speaker’s meaning is inferred
3. Reflection of Feeling – Listener emphasizes emotional aspects of communication through feeling statements – deepest form of listening.” (Michigan Tech University, 2013, Online)

PERSONAL INSIGHT ~ Mindfulness

When we choose to be active and reflective listeners, we are showing personal matter to and acknowledgment of the other person ’ mho overall social welfare. Looking inwardly may prove our greatest challenge in healthy communication. As a player within a relationship, we are choosing to connect beyond a superficial tied. When we are in a relationship, it is vitally important that we are capable of acknowledging our own contribution to that relationship. If we have done incorrectly, we should acknowledge our mistakes seeking to rectify any problems that may have developed. If we have been wronged, we should not seek to solve our problems with negativity rather seek to offer forgiveness and toleration of those who have wronged us. We should endlessly seek to have personal insight. personal penetration is the willingness to confront our behaviors, consequences, and choices in life. It is the ability to rectify any wrongs and stand strong when we have been done wrong. It is the ability to acknowledge our personal limitations and strengths, without being boastful, arrogant or disdainful. personal penetration goes beyond the credence of our character in a relationship, it is a observation of our inward recognition of self. It is adequate to of accepting what we need in inward and outward relationships. Having personal penetration makes us fully aware of our participation in a relationship. Carl Gustav Jung said that “ the world exists not merely in itself, but besides as it appears to me. ” I am because I acknowledge myself to be. When we have personal insight we are mindful. Mindfulness is the ability to be active in the here and now, offering our fully attention to others and self. When you are mindful you recognizing that the consequence exists and all about that consequence is worth your attention. In many relationships that have reached an deadlock, a player within that relationship feels unheard, overshadowed, and unworthy of another ’ mho attention. If we are mindful, we are rejecting the indigence to live in the past. When we are mindful we acknowledge our personal role within a relationship and accept our personal responsibility. The problem in our global today is that we live in a disposable world. If a relationship fails to succeed we plainly dispose of the kinship ; seeking pathways to new relationships. One of the greatest causations of bankruptcy to succeed is the fast pace global with which we reside. “ We are living and working in times of constant change. variety is nothing new. What is fresh is that the pace of deepen is accelerating and mindfulness trains us to focus on the consequence rather than allowing our attention to be hijacked by thoughts about the past or worries about the future. ” ( Woods, 2012, Online ) HEALTHY COMMUNICATION healthy communication is a process. It is the deliberant try to be a wax member of the relationship. While we may make our mistakes, it is through healthy communication that we can rectify any mistakes that occur. furthermore, we can compliment our partner when convinced choices are made in the relationship. _____________________________________________________________________________ Author : Dr. Asa Don Brown, Ph.D., C.C.C., N.C.C.M. �
REFERENCES Block, J. D. ( 2003 ) Naked affair, How to increase true openness in your relationship. New York, NY : The McGraw-Hill Hedges, K. ( 2011 ) Five communication mistakes that are holding you back. Retrieved January 19, 2013 from hypertext transfer protocol : //www.forbes.com/sites/work-in-progress/2011/07/15/five-communication-mistakes-that-are-holding-you-back/ Hendrix, H. & Hunt, H. L. ( 2004 ) Receiving love, Transform your relationship by letting yourself be loved. New York, NY : Atria Books Michigan Tech University ( 2013 ) Reflective heed. Retrieved January 18, 2013 from hypertext transfer protocol : //www.mtu.edu/dean/conduct/officer/docs/Reflective-Listening.pdf Reiser, P. ( 1994 ) Couplehood. New York, NY : Bantam Books

Rogers, C. R. & Farson, R. E. ( 1987 ) Active listen. Retrieved January 19, 2013 from hypertext transfer protocol : //www.go-get.org/pdf/Rogers_Farson.pdf University of Colorado ( 2013 ) General information about communication problems. Retrieved January 20, 2013 from hypertext transfer protocol : //www.colorado.edu/conflict/peace/problem/commprob.htm Woods, J. ( 2012 ) nowadays ’ s the moment for mindfulness. Retrieved January 19, 2013 from hypertext transfer protocol : //www.telegraph.co.uk/health/wellbeing/9772911/Nows-the-moment-for-mindfulness.html

*The views expressed by our authors are personal opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of the CCPA

source : https://nutritionline.net
Category : Healthy